It’s ok not to achieve. It’s ok not to make the accumulation of accomplishments, possessions, and money the goal.
WHAT!
But I spent my whole life chasing accomplishments, growth, and progress. Chasing the next milestone, promotion, skill, life experience. This is who I am. And I’m proud of it.
Stop trying to DO, for once. Planning, thinking about the next steps, adding to the to-do list, being busy. Just stop.
As a dreamer chasing goals my entire life, this was a hard one to digest.
Where does the push to achieve come from? It comes from my desire for growth. But I admit that it’s also influenced by pressure from society, a sense of lack, a sense that I’m not enough – right where I am today.
I’ve always been hungry to reach my fullest potential and make the most of my life.
But at times, pushing to achieve has cost me my ability to be fully present. When I was burnt out and stressed, there was no way I could give my best self to my friends and family. I couldn’t even honor my own health.
I was too blinded to take a moment to breathe, look around, and realize I was climbing the wrong career ladder. I spent so many years chasing the illusion of a dream that ended up fizzling into bubbles.
Was I chasing my goals with the end in mind – or for the pure enjoyment of growing, learning, and applying myself to my dreams?
I’d like to say both.
Ambition in itself is not bad. I love the feeling of fire in my chest, fueling my drive to achieve. It’s a beautiful thing to push yourself to your goals and continuously improve.
But we must take a hard look at where the ambition comes from. Is it there to serve the ego? Does it come from a place of inferiority and lack – because we don’t feel like we are enough, or that we have enough? Are we trying to keep up with everyone else to serve our reputation and self-worth? Or does it come from a whole place of love and service?
There’s a difference between the ambition of the mind and ego, and the ambition of the heart.
Our world has been dominated by the ambition of the mind and ego.
Look around. Are we chasing the right goals, the right definition of success? Once we achieve the next level, the next amount of wealth – aren’t we still dissatisfied? At what point does it stop?
But, you say – Our society is driven forward by ambition! To make progress. To change the world!
Has it been serving us well?
We create a breakthrough innovation… only to realize that it has caused more disconnection, unhappiness, and unrest.
We’ve made so many medical advancements… yet we are getting sicker, fatter, and more drugged.
Did you know that the cure for cancer and most diseases has already been invented?! Using Einstein and Tesla’s knowledge of energy and frequency, we’ve had the technology to cure terminal cancer patients in less than a month – without having to radiate and harm healthy cells.
But painfully, this technology has been suppressed by conventional medicine for over 80 years.
We’ve made so many technological advancements… but look at the disconnection in the world. Loneliness and depression are an epidemic.
We’re digitally connected, but more silo’d than ever in boxes – forgetting that we’re already connected by heart and soul.
The education system tells us to fill in the blank, not question authority, and aspire to go to college so that we can get a good job. For what? To spend the rest of our lives paying off our loans and running laps around the corporate wheel?
Look around at the accumulation of wealth and power in the hands of the few, as the rest of the world works to chase the next thing and buy more possessions. Trying to fill the void.
Have we missed the point?
Some challenges cannot be solved at the same level they were created. We’ve tried replacing systemic problems with yet another system, another technology. But often, these lead to a new set of problems.
We must use a new level of consciousness, of creative thought, of open heart, to solve the problems we face today.
“Systems, whether educational or political, are not changed mysteriously; they are transformed when there is a fundamental change in ourselves. The individual is of first importance, not the system; and as long as the individual does not understand the total process of himself, whether of the left or of the right, can ring order and peace to the world.” – Krishnamurti
The chaos in the world is a reflection of the unrest we feel within. We cannot point a finger at what is ‘wrong’ with society without first looking within. We must evaluate the collective beliefs and fears that have created what we see in our reality.
What happens when we stop running in circles and go within?
INSTEAD OF DOING, JUST BE.
I heard that message from so many different sources and teachers. It took a long while to convince my restless mind to slow down and try it.
Will doors really open – will things come my way – if I just trust and surrender? What will happen if I start creating my dreams from that zero point of stillness, where I’m not trying or desiring?
In that stillness, I can just BE in calm expectation of abundance. I will be provided for. My dreams are already on their way. But I am perfectly happy where I am now.
I handed over the steering wheel to my higher self. She can drive way better than I can. I started tuning into my intuition and relaxing my mind.
It was magical. Doors started opening. I happened to meet the right people at the right time, the best solutions came my way, and my work flowed smoothly. All of it felt effortless.
So many gifts popped up when I surrendered to the universe and let things naturally come to me.
What changed?
It was my mindset. A calm knowing that everything is unfolding beautifully, and I’m exactly where I need to be – right here, right now.
And for years, I’d thought if I stopped swimming with and against the current, I would drown.
I can float?!
Floating is so freeing. The waves gently carry me to the place I need to be next, effortlessly. But it’s not so easy to stay afloat, because it requires complete trust and an open heart.
Stop thrashing around and relax. Let the wind fill your sails as they are meant to be filled. In the quiet calm of your mind, the best ideas crystallize.
“You begin to ask, what is the end, the purpose of living? That is what most people ask. Why are we living? What is the end? What is the goal? What is the purpose? You are concerned with the purpose, with the end, rather than with living in the present; whereas a man who fulfills never inquires into the end because fulfillment itself is sufficient.” – Krishnamurti
So instead of chasing our purpose, our true “purpose” is simply to BE HERE NOW. We’ve heard this in many different forms. “The power of now.” Live without attachment to the outcome. Happiness is the elimination of desire and attachment.
Realize that you, the end goal, the chaos, the beauty – are all one. There is no separation.
For the first time in my life since childhood, I’m prioritizing the energy of BEING over DOING.
It takes getting used to. After years of pushing myself, I’ve allowed my self-esteem to depend on how good I felt about where I was in life in relation to my personal and professional goals. I took so much pride in controlling my mindset, emotions, and self-discipline.
It’s easy to love myself when I’m in control of my life. But what about when I’m down, failing, alone, feeling ugly, losing motivation? Do I love myself even then? Do I know for certain that I would love myself unconditionally – even if I became unrecognizable inside and out?
I’m afraid to find out.
Can I love myself regardless of the identity and personality I’ve so carefully built until today? Because I am not my labels, achievements, or personality.
Deep down, I was afraid of letting go of control. Because losing control made me feel like I’d lose my grip on who I am, my happiness, and my dreams.
So I’ve been terrified to let go of this ambition and drive to achieve – because it has served me well so far. It has helped me get to where I am today.
The subconscious does not like to let go of certain patterns that have had both positive and negative influences on our lives. Since control has helped me achieve my dream life, my subconscious held on to it like a lifeboat.
But controlled ambition can only take me so far in life, and then it plateaus. For me to truly grow and step into my fullest power – I must learn to surrender.
Trust the universe. Step into the flow of life. Love myself unconditionally and be ok with just BEING.
Instead of trying, allow. Instead of stretching my hand out to grasp, open my palm and expect.
What would life be like if we valued surrendering, allowing, and trusting the universe as much as doing, getting ahead, and achieving?
In this culture of doing, we’ve forgotten how to be.
The feminine energy of BEING has been overpowered by the masculine energy of DOING. You can see it in the power structures of the workplace down to the individual mentality.
This masculine energy has taught us to value DOING, and we’ve built our lifestyles and aspirations around it. Imagine how else we’d aspire to live if the feminine energy of BEING was just as prominent?
It would be such a relief to be able to value play, creativity, and surrender just as much as achievement. We can give ourselves that permission, right now.
We must honor the feminine and masculine energies within ourselves and bring both to balance. When they’re combined, we will finally step into our fullest power.
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